Sim Chow

I’ve been invited to a pot-luck holiday party where we’re asked to “bring something from your own cultural background.” But most of the people there will be Outsiders, so I have been thinking about how to prepare typical Sim dishes using Outer World ingredients. As well, I need to use ingredients that are obtainable at this time of year — a problem that we do not face in Sunset Valley, but my friends live in Vancouver where Autumn Salad in December just isn’t going to work.

Photo from inside the oven, of Ronnie putting a pan in to cook.The first thing I ever learned to cook was waffles. And oh, they are good Sim waffles, baked in an oven! Outsiders can’t make anything like them — they don’t have the right kind of pan. Too, the oven must be very hot to get the crispiness right. I won’t deny I’ve burnt a few batches. But anyway, the party is in the evening. I need a traditional Sim dinner recipe.

I have narrowed the choices down to Tri-Tip Steak and Goopy Carbonara.

Carbonara is actually well known in the Outer World, but it is sometimes made too dry. The way to get the Goopiness exactly to your taste is to choose an amount of cream to beat into the egg yolks before adding those to the pan. Now remember that in proper Carbonara, the eggs are cooked mainly by the heat from the just-now-cooked noodles. That doesn’t work very well if the eggs are right-out-of-the-fridge cold, nor if the cream cools them off too much. I put my eggs in hot tap water for a little while, and they come up to a decent temperature while I’m doing the bacon and boiling the pasta. (I warm the cream a little bit too, but this probably only matters because I make my Carbonara quite Goopy in the manner of Sims, so that the amount of cream might be enough to affect the temperature of the egg goo.) By this procedure, I can be confident that the eggs get thoroughly cooked, yet the result remains smooth and moist. In other words, the procedure gives Carbonara, rather than noodles-with-scrambled-eggs.

The Tri-Tip Steak alternative poses a different issue. In this part of the World, the cut of beef called a tri-tip is almost invariably roasted, so I had some doubts that it was the same meat as our Tri-Tip Steak. The very best example of a roasted tri-tip is a dish called Santa Maria Barbecue. Put from your mind all notions of “barbeque sauce”, for that substance is not necessary or relevant here. No, the Santa Maria preparation involves only salt, pepper, and garlic, and oh my goodness it is excellent. However, could it be that the same cut of meat so perfectly designed for that slow-over-the-coals treatment is also the one that Sims broil as a steak? “Yes” is the correct answer. And by enough asking around, I found a few Outsiders who do it in the Sim manner too: in Seattle is a supermarket that cuts their tri-tips into steaks — routinely, without being asked to. Seattle is not so very far from where the party will be, so I assume the same style would be acceptable.

Upon sober reflection, I think Tri-Tip Steak would be too difficult to serve nice and sizzling, if the party’s not at my house. And probably too expensive no matter where the party is. The real clincher is that Goopy Carbonara is my own favourite, so Goopy Carbonara it shall be.

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